June 1995

We all have a tendency to avoid risks. Let's face it, every time you try something new, you run the risk of failing. Ironically, avoiding risk is the worst risk you can take because it's the surest guarantee of boredom, frustration, stagnation and ultimate failure.

Promoting, supporting and rewarding risk is the way to transform risk-avoiders into risk-takers. Here are some guidelines to help you establish a healthy risk-taking environment:

y Use yourself as an example. Talk openly about errors you have made and how you learned from them. (If you aren't making any mistakes, perhaps you aren't trying anything new.)

y Celebrate setbacks as well as successes. Of course, the greatest rewards will go to those who take risks that pay off. But, you also need encouragement when you take a chance and fall on your face. Without this support, you'll be reluctant to try again.

y Don't ask others to bail yourself out when you are a risk-taker. You'll deprive yourself of the chance to learn and grow from experience. Worse, you expect others to bail you out again.

y Encourage smart risks, not foolish chances. You always should have a clear goal in mind before you go out on a limb. Make sure you have considered the worst possible outcome of your actions. Can you live with it? Always have an alternative plan in case things turn sour.

Two Kinds of People

There are two kinds of people on earth today;

Just two kinds of people, no more, I say.

Not the sinner and saint, for it's well understood,

The good are half bad and the bad are half good.

Not the rich and the poor, for to rate a man's wealth,

You first must know the state of his conscience and health.

Not the humble and proud, for in life's little span,

Who puts forth vain airs is not counted a man.

Not the happy and sad, for the swift flying years,

Bring each man his laughter and each man his tear.

No, the two kinds of people on earth I mean,

Are the people who lift and the people who lean.

Wherever you go, you will find earth's masses

Are always divided in just these two classes.

And, oddly enough, you will find, two, I ween,

There's only one lifter to twenty who lean.

In which class are you? Are you easing the load

Of overtaxed lifters, who toil down the road?

Or are you a leaner, who lets others share

Your portion of labor, and worry and care?

Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Tips for Newlyweds, and Oldyweds

More people get married in June than during any other month. Here are some tips for the newly married, and for those of us who may have forgotten:

y Don't expect to change your spouse. You might not like the change.

y If it isn't going to matter in five years, don't worry.

y Sometimes it doesn't hurt to keep your mouth shut.

y Remember the three C's: Compromise, Communication and Cuddling.

y Marriage is not a 50/50 proposition. Sometimes it's 70/30.

y Both people should help with the housework. Everybody makes a mess; everybody should clean up.

Laughter Is Good Medicine

A laugh a day truly may keep the doctor away. Doctors tell us that the physiological effects of laughter affect every part of the body. Oxygen floods the blood, the cardiovascular system dilates, the muscles relax, the diaphragm convulses and the internal organs get massaged.

When we laugh, heart rate and blood pressure speed up. Afterward, these sink below previous measured levels and we feel a sense of relaxation. Some evidence suggests that this increases production of endorphins, the natural pain-relieving, euphoria-producing chemical in the brain.

Author Norman Cousins, when faced with a life-threatening disease, found that a good belly laugh had an anaesthetic effect and allowed him at least two hours of pain-free sleep.

Regardless of your belief in the benefits of a good laugh, it probably doesn't hurt to laugh--unless you laugh so hard you fall out of your chair.

Source: Work and Family. Vol. 3, No. 1

Warning Signs of Mental Illness

Mental illness is pervasive in our society, touching the lives of millions!directly or indirectly. The stigma toward mental illness stands in the way of understanding the people who suffer!most of whom could be treated if they only realized that early diagnosis and treatment are possible.

Paul Find, M.D., past president of the American Psychiatric Association, recommends that the warning signs of mental illness become prominent in the minds of all Americans. Demystifying mental illness will go a long way in helping the public recognize and understand symptoms which are characteristic of mentally ill people.

The 10 Warning Signs of Mental Illness

1. Marked personality change

2. Inability to cope with problems and daily activity

3. Strange or grandiose ideas

4. Excessive anxieties

5. Prolonged depression and apathy

6. Marked changes in eating or sleeping patterns

7. Thinking or talking about suicide

8. Extreme highs or lows

9. Abuse of alcohol or drugs

10. Excessive anger, hostility, or violent behavior